Sunday 17 March 2013

Is Love Truly Better The Second Time

You've known this guy/girl for a while now. You dated, and due to one reason or the other or even tons of reasons (LOL), you broke up. A while after, you both have moved on and either got in touch again or din't lose it at all. One way or another things start to feel mushy again, old feelings come back and you are wondering if you should give it a try again.

A lot of people say love is better the second or third or fifth time after. This is very true in some cases because for starters, time has passed and you have both learn't a lot, you seem much wiser to handle settle things now.

 A lady told me her story of how she had serious commitment issues when the guy had to travel. She said after a while she felt like she was back to being single and their relationship became boring. After a while, she ended it. Today, they are back together and he is in an even further place but she feels she can handle it now. So many of us are like this lady, but the question is; are you truly ready to do it all over again?

Here are some ideas that might help you. Before you jump into that relationship again, what were the reasons that made you leave in the first place? Are they still there and standing strong or is it something you can learn to live with now without jeopardizing your happiness. A relationship involves two people who are willing to make the other person happy because they love them that much. Do you feel you are better equipped now to deal with what ever went wrong in the past? If yes, then i think you are on the right part.

But if no, maybe you need to sit down and seriously analyze your situation. If you really love this person that much, can you adapt? If still no, can it be changed? Would the person be willing to make adjustments so you both can be happy? Would such adjustments make the other person unhappy? These are some questions you have to sincerely ask yourself and your soon-to-be partner. A relationship takes more than love to stand and its pretty easy for love to turn to hate as they are both strong emotions. Running from the problem win't do you any good so you might as well dismiss such thoughts. In the long run, it would eventually catch up with you.

It's time for you to get real with each other. At the same time, what you are feeling might just be your mind bringing up something of old that's familiar. Make sure you address what went wrong the last time and trash it out then  come up with new ways to make this time feel different from the other. Make it more exciting and worth while for each other. The person being your 'ex' might seem like a disadvantage to most people but you can look at it from the point that you already know yourselves so you are better equipped to make it work this time.

Love is patient, love is kind, love doesn't envy, it doesn't boast; it's not proud. It doesn't dishonor others, it is not self seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs, it always protects, always trusts, always hopes =, always preserves and most of all, it delights in the truth.

All the best.

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