Wednesday, 20 March 2013

Should A Woman Be The First To Make A Move?

This question seems to have no definite answer. A twitter handle called 'questionnaire' threw out this question "Ladies, can you ask a guy out?" a lady answered yes and it brought a lot of comments. Some people were like good that we are in the 21st century while others were like NO! that she would appear too cheap.

But really, would she?

A female friend of mine met a guy late last year and they clicked. They spoke regularly and i thought things would move to the next level. They kept chanting each other's name to me and it was like 'love made in Tokyo'. After about a month, the lady started complaining that she didn't understand the guy that he doesn't seem interested. This baffled me because right from the get go, this guy was crazy about her.

To cut the long story short, the guy said he was confused because the girl was acting like she did not like him. She complained whenever he was nice to her or complimented her and he wasn't sure what to do again. The girl on the other hand said she can't let him know that she likes him. She acts nonchalantly towards him to hide her true feelings yet she expects the poor boy to keep trying. She would rather cry in her room over what hasn't happened than tell him how she feels.

Dear readers, is this the way things should be? Must the guy nearly kill himself before you let him know how you feel? Asking someone out can be nerve wracking, not to talk of the humiliation that comes if she says no. In this time and age where women are playing leading roles everywhere, why can't they also take the bold step and make the first move.

Or guys, do you like the chase? Does it make you feel more of a man when you try hard to get her and eventually do? Does it make her any less of a decent woman if she lets you know how she feels about you? Would her honesty be taken for granted or misused by the so called 'players'?

I would like to know your opinion on this, because there are a lot of people suffering from self inflicted heart aches just because of this...

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  1. That's if they Like... Anybody can make the first move. It doesn't really matter. Seems to Matter in Africa tho.


  2. Austin [AYn OH]20 March 2013 at 20:15

    I am a guy buh i fink it depends on d circumstances cuz most tymz wen shi does, shid appear cheap or desperate. If U ask mi, i think shi shldnt buh rather came d chase t 2 hard 4d dude.

  3. Different stroke Ƒo̲̣̥Ʀ diff folks. Ȋ̝̊̅ say wateva rocks ur boat but candidly, d fear O̶̷̩̥̊͡f being labelled cheap myt make some girls nt do dat. Personally Ȋ̝̊̅ cnt do dat but dats nt τ̲̅ọ̥ say if d guy comes Ȋ̝̊̅ wnt show interest. It's beta we define it from d start rather than get halfway n become confused. Dats too much heartache.

  4. Hmm. I do not think that a lady should make the first move. However, what she can do is to be receptive to the guy, be warm, smile, and not give an attitude. This does NOT mean that she should continually call him, go to his house to cook for him, turn into an unpaid househelp, or make a genaral fool of herself.

    By being warm, a guy who is shy or uncertain of his feelings will be more likely to mention that he likes her, and initiate steps to start a relationship.

    Nevertheless, a lady should be smart enough to recognise when a guy is 'just being a friend'.


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Feel free to share them below ... Chizy K

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